When your child goes to bed late and can't get up in the morning

What follows combines several children's visits into one reconstructed account. It is not any one child's story, and anything that could identify someone has been removed.

What we often hear

• "They stay up late and can't get up in the morning."
• "Waking them up is a battle every day."
• "Does getting too little sleep affect their height?"

How do children come in?

They fall asleep at 1 or 2 a.m. and get up at 7, day after day, and are always tired during the day. During exam periods, they even get stomachaches.

Parents come in thinking it's a stamina problem. But when we look closely, lack of sleep often comes first.

What do we look at first?

First, we write down what time they go to bed and get up, and what they eat and when. These two things explain most of it.

If a child has a habit of eating instant noodles or sweets late at night, it's harder to fall asleep and the stomach keeps working during sleep. Skipping breakfast and eating a lot at dinner points the same way.

It's common for kids to eat almost no vegetables or seafood, only flour-based foods and meat. We're not pointing fingers — we look at it because it's something that can be changed.

What about the stomachaches?

If it only hurts during exam periods, it's often tension showing up in the belly. Kids say their belly gurgles, their stools are loose, and they don't feel done after the bathroom.

But if it keeps hurting in one spot, wakes them up at night, or comes with weight loss or blood in the stool, see a pediatrician first.

How do we treat it?

We work on settling the stomach and helping absorption. Together, we also decide how to move bedtime a little earlier, step by step.

We don't ask you to move it two hours earlier at once. We move it 15 minutes at a time. It has to be a size the child can stick to, or it won't last.

Telling a child "go to bed early" doesn't change anything. We look together at what they're doing at night and decide to move one of those things earlier.

How did children do?

First, they say it's less hard to get up in the morning. Whether the stomachaches have improved can only be seen after the exam period is over.

Whether their height or grades have changed is not something we can speak to. What we look at is sleep and the stomach.

What are the limits of this approach?

Bedtime is largely decided by after-school academy schedules and exams. That's not something we can change for you.

One more thing: if your child is excessively sleepy during the day or snores heavily, other checks are needed. In children, large tonsils are sometimes the cause.

Summary for parents

1. It looks like a stamina problem, but lack of sleep often comes first.
2. If you write down when they sleep and what they eat when, that explains most of it.
3. Late-night eating makes it harder to fall asleep and burdens the body during sleep.
4. Move bedtime 15 minutes at a time — a size they can stick to.
5. Excessive daytime sleepiness or heavy snoring needs a separate check.

We start by checking where things stand right now. We won't rush you; we tell you, based on evidence, whether it's OK to wait or not.

If you're not sure whether to wait or to do something now, come and see us. We'll check where your child stands right now, and we won't rush you.

Because daily routines differ, progress differs from child to child, even with the same care.